Under Construction

pressure busts pipes... but pressure also helps create diamonds. so, the key isn't necessarily avoiding pressure as much as maximizing the moment... where's the beef? is it hiding with Waldo? who shot J.R.???

OK, HERE'S THE SITUATION

my parents went away on a weeks vacation and... i've covered the change of seasons and people's relational sense of urgency. is relational even a word??? what i'm realizing, however, is that this autumn/winter has me looking in the metaphorical mirror and "decoding" my own words to the person/s with whom there has been at least a casual interest... follow me for a sec...

while i've been saying, in all honesty even, that i wasn't ready for a relationship but that i was willing to engage in freak nasty activity up to and including lewd, lascivious behavior and possible sodomy, not to mention a p90x contending cardio vascular workout (pats self on back) an in-the-meantime quasi fling thing; what i'm now realizing i meant was that i was, and am, ready for a relationship... just not confident that i've found "her"...

all of this self-examination in my personal life is mirroring what is quickly becoming a spiritual awakening of sorts as well... one that has me feeling a very real need to DO SOMETHING about what i've long held contempt for... the practice of playing church, and practicing religion not out of a yearning for true knowledge and understanding, but out of long practiced and mimicked behaviors... but, alas, that's another post (sighs)...

ENOUGH CRYING ALREADY,
time for some true soul-searching... something more definite than "i'll get back to you when i know something". time for a grown ass man, to grow even more... i refuse to settle. i also refuse to bust... if that means that i'm becoming a diamond (in the most non-gay way possible, lol)... then bling bling!!!

o_O also in the most non-gay way possible O_o

...and remember - loose lips sink ships, but they also make for a hell of an afterparty!!! #huh